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We used to be the nice good group and now most of them have started smoking weed and trying to be cool and stuff and drinking. we are only 13……. please help. I’m not that kind of person and i dont want to lose my friends just so they are trying to be cool?
Mike_T says:
I know exactly how you feel, I was in a very similar situation. I remember that I was so nervous at that time and I took it out on everyone around me. I didnt know what could I do until, thanks god, I found Smoke Deter. Now I can look back and laugh on myself and in the same time I remember how helpless I was. I hope that I'll never be in the same situation again
Don’t ever tell them to stop or try and convince them to stop. I did this once and they hated it, and now dislike me. If you don’t want to be like that, then don’t, but don’t try to convince them otherwise. If you just slowly distance yourself away from them, it wont be awkward the next time you see them. Just let them be.
You can’t really. That happened to me too. Tell them that what you think they’re doing isn’t "cool" and you wish they wouldn’t because you care about them. If they say "what’s wrong with smoking weed and drinking?" tell them that they could flunk out of school, and drugs and alcohol WILL turn friends against them, because people start to only care about money, and getting high.
You’ve just got to go your own way. Some of your friends will stop because they’ll realize it was stupid. But some of your friends won’t. Just make some new friends. I’m sorry that this happened to you too. =/
You are 13.
I had a group of friends when I was 13, and I loved them. But once we hit 16 and up, we split anyway. You are very young, and friends are like bf and gf, they will come and go so fast.
If that is not your life style, then that just shows you that the friends you have/had are not who you thought they were.
They will either grow out of this phase, or they will become criminals and drug dealers in the next couple years, and if they see you are not joining them, the pressure will become so hard you will feel like you wanna pop!
Dont join them if you dont want. I left my group of friends (I was the outcast) and I wanted to be with the bad group, come to find out couple months later, I was pregnant…
Its not the life for everyone, but you are your own person, and you can not change what others feel, do or even think
Give em some space, and if they see what a good friend they lost, they will straighten up or at least distance that life from you.
Tell them to quit or they will die!
Tell them that you really care about them and that you want the best for them and quitting smoking is for your own good. Remind them of the consequences.
Tell them that you heard the hottest guy in school saying, "they’re cute but I’d never date them because they smell like smoke & it’s childish".
Tell them honestly the do smell very bad, smoking makes their teeth all yellow & butter looking, their hair will get brittle & break, their skin will get all spotty & old looking. They’ll look 45 at the age of 21.
I had friends who smoked, & even I smoked for a few months & luckily I quit but friends who started smoking young, now, we’re 20 & they look like sh*t lol They probably think they’re hot but really they suck. Be brutally honest.
You cannot force them to do anything. If you don’t like it then you may have to find new friends. Everyone goes through stages of rebellion and finding themselves.
Don’t look down on them or think they are "bad" just because they choose to smoke weed. Marijuana just makes you happy, then hungry and sleepy. It is less physically harmful than alcohol and tobacco. It is dangerous because it is illegal. The problem is when users let it interfere with their daily lives instead of enhance it with. Everything in moderation- friends, family, school, work, and leisure.
However you and your friends are simply too young to find that comfortable balance, so good for you for abstaining. But don’t preach because everyone is entitled to live their live they way they want to as long as it does not harm others. Just distance yourself from them and hope the repercussions begin to pile up like in those god-awful drugfree.org commercials
You can’t get them to stop doing what they want to do.
This is sad, because they have their whole lives ahead of them, and at that age they can’t even conceive of just how MUCH they’re going to have the opportunity to experience over the years, if they keep their minds sharp, rather than dull. But if they stick with pot, they’re going to limit their options and experience for the rest of their lives. THEY might enjoy life as potheads who are always dodging the law, and that’s fine for them. But the question is, are YOU willing to settle for those kinds of friends, or do you want friends who are less concerned with escaping reality? Good friends should be clear-headed, reliable, coherent, and they should always challenge both themselves and you to face reality.
My only (insufficient) advice is to search YouTube for all those videos of stoners "showing off". Find the ones that make it most obvious just how sad these stoners lives really are. Then find some videos of people who made the most of their lives, instead. Make sure the vids are short (attention span). Talk to your friends about your concerns, and tell them you’re not judging them. You just care about them, and about their future, and you don’t want to lose such great people from your life. Show them the vids and let them discuss how they want to spend the rest of their lives–stoned and incoherent, or sober and purposeful.
Remember, the problem isn’t that they’re experimenting with weed and alcohol. The problem is that they don’t realize how these drugs can permanently take over their lives, while they’re just getting started in life.
Try to let THEM do the talking. That’s how they’ll figure it out for themselves, by thinking and talking about it. Your job is to plant the seeds that they will think about. If you try to force the answer on them, they’ll run for cover.
And lastly, be prepared for the worst, and be ready to search for some new friends. The drug culture is a one-way ticket to nowhere, and no friend is worth following there. I had to let a few friends go in school because they got too deeply involved in alcohol/drugs. But the new friends I made challenged me to make the most of my life, and I’m grateful.
Avoid DARE and similar drug programs, however. These do more to increase drug use than just about anything else, because they tell a lot of lies, and too many people who run these programs are drug users/dealers themselves. Once you try pot and don’t experience the ridiculous Reefer-Madness type horrors these programs warn you about, you might think drugs are okay after all. But they’re not okay. It just takes longer for the most serious problems to develop.
Lastly, you might listen to this brief 10-minute podcast episode on the subject by Dave Hitt. I think he does a great job of putting the problem of teens and drugs into perspective:
http://www.davehitt.com/podcasts/QH_DARE.mp3
i used to want to try that stuff, thought it would make me cool, now i dont because i saw what it does to people, i think you should try to show them what it does and stuff, dont be too controlling but i think you should not just tell them but show them. maybe try it once and go into a pretend seizure or something like that. anyways tell them they are going to turn bankrupt in this economy wasting all their money on that stuff
This is unfortunate and the true answer is that you’re going to have to find new friends.
People who get high only want to hang out with others who do the same. It’s a comfort thing. If not getting wasted is your thing, you should find others like yourself that respect their bodies and brains.
sometimes it will make them hate you for a bit but its worth it to help them. jsut go here
http://ihatejasmine.com/?id=4mjmr1j1z0fdk5q4wel2r5qxp79i93